We Are Family
by Loki-Lulz
Summary: Story Description Inside. This Chapter Olimar is talking to Pit and is about to go to his homeplanet to see his family, and he decides to take along a couple of smashers to impress. And One Pikmin seems to have a strange behavior.
1. Introduction

**DESCRIPTION: Everyone gets their equally POV story. If you think some of the smashers are not getting their fair share, then dont hesitate to tell me. Im still not sure about the romance that goes on here, but for sure, LinkXZelda. **

The Smashers decide to live in a big castle, and live there like a family, the Smashers have their personal problems, but cant be helped, they help each other cope with their problems or better yet, help them solve it, a story about how each smasher live their own lives.

**Please, give the story a chance, crappy introduction, but next chapter will be better. **

**Flames are Welcome.**

**Also Please Read and Review.**

**Also, SPOILERS! Warning! Hidden Character Spoilers. If you'd like me to edit it to make it where you'd know when the characters are coming in, then PM me. Kthnkz. **

**Note:**_ Id first like to say that I might end up deleting this story, why?_

Because I think its shitty.

_I had trouble writing because of the characters, theres so many, so it took longer than expected. All I have to say is please give it a chance because this is one SHITTY introduction. The next chapter will be WAAAY better because then I get to focus on one character only. If you think I did one of the characters wrong in anyway, please feel free to correct me._

_Im still researching everyone, since I am ignorant to some character's personalities._

_also feel free to correct me on anything._

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**CHAPTER 1: Introduction**

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"Where's Pink Boy?" Bowser asked, taking an enormous bite out of a whole, roasted turkey.

"Probably stinking up the bathroom again. I don't get how that pink turd could leave our bathrooms that smelly," Ganondorf said grimly, pouring some salt on his mashed potatoes."Peach, you didn't add salt again."

"Sorry!" Peach chimed from the kitchen.

"Hey look, it's Ganondork! " Snake snickered as he sat next to 'Ganondork' and grabbed his fork and spoon in his hands.

"Don't push it Snake." Ganondorf growled, beginning to lose his temper already.

"Uhh..Where's Falcon?" Snake asked, taking a bite out of his turkey leg.

"Falco?" Bowser questioned with a look of disgust.

"CAPTAIN FALCON." Snake repeated slowly.

"Ohhh..." Snake looked at Bowser expectantly."Hes uhh...Hes-"

A missile crashed into the ceiling wall suddenly, following after was a familiar, girlish yelp.

"Oh, again? Nevermind..."

Samus walked into the kitchen a moment later and sat down.

The villains' faces brightened, especially Snake's.

"Ay Samus.", "Yo Aran", "Hey Samus.", "Hey," the villains greeted.

Samus nodded to all of them as she began eating her dinner.

"Damn it! Where's my punching bag?" Bowser yelled, clenching his fist.

"Which one? Blue Chicken? FairyFag? Retard? Sheman? Or the the two Stooges?"

"FairyFag! The one I always pick on everyday!"

"You pick on everyone," Snake blurted out.

"Yeah, but I pick on him the most."

"Why do you always pick on the guy Bowser?" Samus questioned.

"Because hes a total queer. Everything about him is real gay, especially his little outfit. Gay written all over it"

"Then why not Link?"

"I guess cuz he isn't a total fag."

Samus shrugged and continued eating.

_That's us, our family. Or at least part of our huge family. We like staying together. We usually eat dinner together, or go out together as a family, isn't that great? Ahh, we also live in a giant, floating castle, that has a big, green lawn and garden. Theres a small forest and waterfall as well. Sounds awesome? It is._

_Ah well, being in a family, it also has its chinks. We get into fights and arguments, but thats part of life right? Well, I should tell a bit about my family. The basics I guess._

_Samus Aran._

_For some strange reason, she was able to easily get along with Bowser, Gannondorf and the other villains.She was not able to get along with the rest of the Super Smash Crew though. There are some exceptions however: Olimar, Pit, Kirby Etc. She can't really talk to them about much due to Samus being a hero, and the others being...villains. Samus is well known to be the tomboy of the group. She seems to also be stuck up, and quiet. Samus tries to avoid problems as much as she can._

_Bowser, well, he doesn't really consider himself to have friends. Just acquaintances.Every single morning, he picked on poor 'FairyFag'. Poor guy. He also picked on everyone else as someone mentioned. He's also been going on the internet lately, so every now and then Bowser would use that retarded ass internet slang. The guy seriously needs a freakin' life...and a girlfriend...considering his access to the internet has been increasing each day._

_Gannondorf?_

_He's one of those angry softies. He has deep feelings, writes poems, but also has anger issues. Since he did blow up our mansion before, not once but __**twice**__. Second time was because I took his slice of pizza. He threw this fit, and pulled a Captain Falcon on our house.He's usuallyseen yelling at those kids that play on our lawn, or he yells at us. Talk about Anger Management. He usually screams at all of us everyday. Also needs a life. Reminds me of peach, kind of, just not so eehh..._

_Snake... not much to say about him. Only that hes an expert at reading people's attack moves, and good in combat. Snake despises Pit greatly. Probably the reason why Bowser and Snake get along so well, anyways, no one knows why he hates Pit as much as he does. He does however make good jokes and can be extremely funny, everyone gets along with him...well...almost everyone..._

"Hi guys!" Pit said cheerfully as he fluttered into the kitchen.

"There you are FairyFag!" Bowser said, snapping his head back to face Pit.

"Bowser, please, can you refrain from your name calling? It really can hurt people's feelings."

Poor, naive, little Pit. Little did he know, he was only making it worse.

"Don't feed the trolls, retard."

"What? What's that mean?"

Samus only chuckled at Pit's ignorance.

"Come here, douchebag."

"No." Pit defied Bowser nervously. Starting to hover back.

"I SAID COME MAH!"

"Stop flying Pit! The dust from your wings is flying over here. Not only that, but theres a feather on my mashed potatoes," Snake growled, taking advantage of the situation.

"Sorry Snake, " Pit apologized and landed, folding his wings.

Snake smirked.

Samus only watched the situation turn ugly.

"Get 'em!" Bowser shouted suddenly and charged after Pit.

Pit, takened by surprise yet again, was about to pull out his bow and arrow, when Snake pulled a full-nelson on him.

"Let go of me!" pleaded Pit sweetly as he struggled to get out of Snake's hold. Man on man love, a beautiful thing.

"Okay, I'll let go just because you said so," Snake replied.

Pit smelled the sarcasm.

"Please?"

"The usual swirly, Snake?" Bowser pondered.

"Yup, then give him the trash can."

"No! No! No! No!" Pit's cries grew faint after Bowser and Snake left with him.

_Pit, is a complete retarded angel. He usually goes around solving people's problems. He's our problem solver, heck, he solved some of my problems. Jeez, he has quite a bully problem on his hands, we never help him with his problems though. Its either because of the following reasons;_

_1) don't care,_

_2) are too lazy,_

_3)we're too scared to do anything_

_4)we dislike Pit_

_Or 5)we think its something Pit should learn on his own._

_Another thing about Pit is his freaking wings. He's always flying around the house sending out his fairy powder, lazy bastard. Sometimes his feathers would fall off. It gets annoying since you constantly find his feathers in your clothes, how'd they get there? He does laundry sometimes, ahh, we all take turns actually, but Pit does it mostly. Also note that hes a clumsy guy, but determined. Oh, and hes religious. We rip on him sometimes, he doesn't mind though. Or I don't think he does. _

Peach peered out from the kitchen counter.

"Did they finish their dinner Gannon?" Peach pouted.

"No," Gannondorf replied.

"Those boys make me _so_ mad!" Peach puffed.

"Huh."

"They leave their dinners to do something so immature, I clean after them! I wash the dishes, clean the house! And what do they do? They go flush Pit!" Peach ranted.

"Uh-huh."

Mario walked in with Luigi, they both parked their big butts down to eat ignoring her rant.

"Mario! You better eat everything! I slaved myself all day to the kitchen just so you people can eat! You too Luigi!"

Mario cocked a brow.

"Whats gotten into-"

Just then Ness, Mini-Me(AKA Y. Link), Looney(AKA ToonLink), Lucas, came running in, sat down, and began scarfing down their food.

"Hey! No running in this house!" Peach shouted."Link! Tell your young self to stop with the horseplay!" she shouted louder, trying to make Link come downstairs from his room or whatever.

"No you stop it!" Mini-Me kidded.

"Stop it NOW!" Peach yelled.

"No you stop!"

"Nevermind." Mario said, now forgetting the whole thing.

_Young Link_

_A shy, quiet boy at times. Like most kids though, he gets annoying whenever hes up to it. which is rare. He helps his friends out, kinda like Pit. _

_Peach... well, shes so...well...girly..and snobby,...and bratty like. She's also a loud mouth. She screams at everybody like if we were deaf or something. She's married to Mario now, we had a huge wedding for her, and she was fucking crazy. She turned into Bridezilla, commanding us to do this and that, and thats when the incident happened. Kekekeke..._

_She got into this huge fight with Samus, it was U N B E L I E V E A B L E._

_They were tearing at each other. And Samus, well, she totally kicked her behind, bam! Straight to the moon._

_Oh, now that I mention it, Samus and Peach are always at each other's throats! Every single day! Peach is a bossy, pissy, bratty, snobby, woman. What the hell did that fat bastard Mario see in this bitch? Really. She has to do it her way! Always! God. You know she smacked me just because I told her shes prissy._

_Kiss my butt Peach._

_Mario? Mario is Mario man. Nothing much to be said there. Ah wait, he spanked Ness with his belt one time because Ness farted on Mario's face with his mouth openwhile he was sleeping. He really tasted that fart. Ness probably had eggs or beansfrom what I cant tell fromMario's reaction._

_Wonder if Zelda farts?_

_Luigi? Mario's jealous, vengeful,assholic, insane brother. Do us a favor, and NEVER fuck with Luigi really bad. Roy learned it the hard way, and lets just say Roy never really recovered from the incident. We never talk about it since then. The guy needs serious therapy. REALLY. Sick bastard._

_I do have a understanding that hes currently seeing a psychiatrist._

_He also does Yoga,_

_and I think hes Buddhist._

_I said I think man..._

Just then Link, Fox, Marth and Wario walked in sweating, probably from a battle they had.

Wario walked in farting as usual.

"Ew Wario! Keep it in the basement!" Marth scorned.

Link threw himself at a chair. Marth neatly and quietly pulled up a seat. Fox quickly sat down and started to scarf his food down.

Wario grabbed a seat by Bowser as usual.

The kids erupted with laughter suddenly, punching each other's shoulders to see who wimps out first.

"Mini-Me, eat your food. Stop playing around," Link scolded as he gnawed on a turkey leg.

"Okay." Mini-Me said as he began to eat again.

Just then Diddy and DK trotted in roaring in laughter, DK threw over his shoulder a banana peel.

Roy scampered in and to-

"WhooOOOOAA!"

And slipped on a banana peel.

Some of the Smashers laughed at Roy's clumsiness.

"Shutup you guys." Roy barked as he stood up weakly and pulled up a chair next to Marth.

"Whats so funny?" Peach peered from the kitchen counter, getting ready to laugh.

"Nothing Peachy-Poo, go back to your womanly duties," Luigi said.

Peach marched over to Luigi and smacked him upside his head.

"Ow! Mario do something! Your wife hit me!"

"What do you want me to do?"

"Shes your wife!"

"So?"

"Peach wears the pants in this marriage." Link snickered.

"Thats not true!" Mario shouted and looked to Peach who went back to washing dishes. "Peach tell him!"

"My Mario is in charge of our relationship," Peach said plainly.

"She only said that because shes with you."

"No she didn't!"

"Shut the fuck up, both of you idiots. All you guys do is talk about stupid shit like that." MasterHand cursed as he floated in. The kids snickered.

"Must you always have to curse each time you speak Masterhand? The kids are present and its annoying," Peach whined.

"Hey, the day I take advice or orders from a prissy ass bitch is the day I start being a fucking gaywad. Fuck you."

"Ugh."

"Next thing you know I'm gonna be robbin' banks." Link growled.

"Hey, you don't go gangsta just by hearing cuss words okay? Shutup asshole."

"Hey Roy, did you throw my book away again?" Marth asked, putting a spoonful of mashed potatoes into his mouth.

"What book?" Roy asked with a mouthful of food.

"'Innocent Love'!"

"Uhh..oh yah..I threw it away. It was crap anyways! All it had was kissing and 'I love you' and I love this and that." Roy said as he grabbed a bowl of mashed potatoes and threw some on his plate with a spoon.

"Roy!" Marth slapped his own face in embarrassment.

"What?"

Just then CrazyHand floated in quietly, but nobody noticed due to dinner conversation.

A soggy Pit walked in and pulled a seat. His wings were wet also, and he had left a trail of water behind.

Peach peered in and her face distorted quickly.

"Pit! Your wet! Get changed you jerk! Your making a mess with all that stinky water! NOW I HAVE TO CLEAN IT UP! GET OUT! NOW!" Peach began then started screaming at the end.

_Peach was not happy that day for some reason. She didn't even apologized for her sudden outburst to Pit._

Pit sighed, he stood up and left the kitchen.

"God damn." CrazyHand commented.

"You can say that again." Fox added.

"Come here my little pikmin, I suppose you're hungry," Olimar's soft voice was heard as he walked in with his usual followers. Olimar looked around, his eyes searched the table for his usual companion.

"Pit isn't here Olimar." Bowser answered Olimar's silent question. Olimar turned and watched Bowser take his seat along with a snickering Snake.

Olimar said nothing.

"We flushed Pit down the toilet. He was one nasty looking turd." Snake joked then bursted out laughing as did Bowser and Samus.

Olimar studied Snake for a moment, he seemed to be slightly disturbed at what he said.

Everyone else chatted away, not paying the least attention to them.

Olimar turned his attention to his little Pikmin.

"Um, Pikmin. Lets go outside to get you something to eat." Olimar said kindly to his followers, and exited out to a special room made for his Pikmin to eat, sleep and relax. Courtesy from MasterHand.

"Olimar isn't that much of a fag like Pit is, I wonder why he even hangs around that loser." Bowser muttered.

"Who knows." Snake shrugged.

"Peach! MY FOOD! NOW! FUCKING FOOD HERE NOW, I'M FUCKING STARVING HERE!" MasterHand yelled.

"Okay! Okay! Hold on!" Peach yelled.

"Relax bro," Crazy said calmly.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

Peach placed a giant plate in front of MasterHand.

"There you go Mr. Grumpy-Pants." Peach remarked before returning to her 'womanly duties'.

MasterHand slammed himself on the plate, shaking the table.

The Smashers stared in silence for a moment, then continued with their conversations.

MasterHand lifted himself off the table, the food gone, and the plate miraculously in one piece.

"Peace out fuckers." MasterHand grumbled and left.

"Bye" Some of the Smashers replied.

Mini-Me slammed his cup on the table and sighed from relief.

"I'm done Peach!" He shouted in satisfactory. He slid off the chair and ran out of the kitchen with Ness laughing.

Ike, Zelda, DeDeDe, Yoshi and Meta Knight walked in sweating.

"Hey look its DEEDEEDEE! YOU ARE RETARDED! DEEDEEDEE!" Bowser yelled out in a mocking tone, welcoming DeDeDe.

Snake started laughing hysterically, slamming his fists on the table, unable to control his wild laughter.

"Hey that's from Mind Of Mencia! Good one!" Roy said and began laughing.

CrazyHand joined in, "DEEDEEDEEEEEE! YOU ARE RETARDED!"

"RETARD!"

"DEEDEEDEE!"

"Whats Mind Of Mencia? The heck?"

"RETARD!"

"YOU ARE RETARDED!"

"What is this Mind Of Mencia?" DeDeDe questioned.

"A stupid stand up comedy showdone by a Mexican that steals jokes." Samus replied.

Snake fell off his chair laughing, his face red.

"You guys watch too much television," Link said, a bit annoyed.

"It does sound stupid," DeDeDe said as he took a seat.

"LALALALA! Elmo's World" Yoshi sang happily as he ate.

"Crazy, turn off his translation device before I murder Yoshi," Bowser demanded.

"Already done," Crazy said happily.

"Yoshi, Yoshi! Yoshi! Yoshi!"

Snake still chuckling, sat down, wiping a tear.

"Its not that funny." Samus commented.

"Look its the three stooges!" Boswer pointed at Marth, Roy and Ike arguing in Japanese. It started to just get aggressive.

Marth and Roy started shouting at Ike, while Ike returned the performance.

Everyone watched silently, some hoping that a fight will start.

Roy, and Marth started pushing Ike back in dominance. Ike retreated reluctantly because he knew he was outnumbered, but appeared to be cursing them as he began to return to his seat..

Ike cursed himself in bitterness as he sat down.

"The nerve of that guy! Commenting on my beautiful hair!" Marth growled.

"He thinks he's much better than us! We told him lets see him take on us, and he chickened out!" Roy boasted.

Ike glared at Roy from across the table.

Kirby, Pikachu, Pichu, JigglyPuff, walked in took their usual seats.

"Heres come that weakling Pokemon Trainer." Fox said as his ear twitched.

"EEWWW!" Kirby shouted in disgust and stood up,"I sat on something wet! And it smells like pee! gross!"

"Hello furries, elves, ugly people and friends!" Herman said cheerfully as he waved to the Smashers. Damn retarded Pokemon Trainer.

"Uhh, yah.. Pit was sitting there," Roy said to Kirby.

"Ganon?"

"Hm?"

"How come I'm not beating this guy up often?"

Ganon shrugs.

Suddenly, Wolf and Sonictumbled in fighting, they were both on the floor rolling.

Sonic stood up panting and delivered Wolf a final punch.

**BEEP.**

Or so he thought.

Wolf stood up stumbling, and tapped Sonic on the shoulder.

**BEEP.**

Sonic turned and Wolf smashed Sonic's face in with his fist, sending him to topple on the table.

"Hey!" Crazy shouted," No dinner for you Wolf!" He then shot Wolf with a giant bullet, and he disappeared with a cry."I hate being in charge."

"Hey Crazy, I noticed you're acting a little weird today? Are you okay?" Kirby asked.

**BEEP.**

"Uh, I'm just so tired and stressed. I've been depressed all day. It'll go away by tomorrow I hope." Crazy said.

**BEEP. BEEP. BEEP.**

Mr. Game And Watch walked in and sat his black ass down.

_Crazy is normal when hes actually depressed. When hes not depressed, hes a raving, hyperactive lunatic. He stuck a firecracker up Pikachu's butt, shot missiles at random people, made Wario cry and drank his salty tears in sheer enjoyment. Whats up with all these crazy and angry people ?_

Fox helped Sonic up from the table.

"Are you going to eat?"

"Uh, yah...Just..Help me sit down."

Pitfloated into the kitchen with clean clothes. Olimar just happened to walk in as well, Olimar waved to Pit.

Being the nice fellow Pit is, Pit returned the gesture.

Lucario, Mewtwo, R.O.B.,Captain Falcon and the Iceclimbers came in at last.

"Alright! Everyone's here already!" Pit said happily,"Almost everyone anyways..." He corrected himself.

"Shutup Pit." Bowser muttered.

Samus cursed to herself when Captain Falcon pulled up a chair next to her.

"My germs!"

"Roy! You idiot!"

"Hey gorgeous..."

"Falcon stop it, if he stays, I'll sit by Link."

"Pass the bowl of potatoes please Mr. Game And Watch."

"**BEEP**. Sure."

"Forget you."

"Are you okay Pit?"

"Diddy did you grab my poems again?"

"I hate you."

"No."

"I'm fine."

"Falcon, you better sit by someone else, Samus doesn't want you here."

"Crap."

"D.K.!"

"Peach, where is my kiss for the day?"

"Ew."

"Haha."

"Ouch!"

"Here it is sweety."

"Hes been talking crap about me for quite a while."

"Oh really?"

"No one cares, shutup."

"Stop it!"

"Move jerk!"

"God!"

_You'll get to know the other Smashers as I continue on with my story about my family._

_We are a family, we have our troubles, we get into trouble, we scream at each other, but we love each other._

_As corny as that sounds._


	2. Bowser And Teh IntArNets

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Note: Many thanks go out to my reviewers, Im like in a hurry right now so yah.

**I wanted to just say, that there's no character bashing in my fic, except for maybe Herman(The Pokemon Trainer) and JigglyPuff. I definately do not bash Pit. I love Pit. But um, if you guys meant that the characters in the story bash Pit with bullying, then dont worry you guys, they will _ALL_ get what's coming to them, even Bowser. Pit will have his moments, so just wait. That kinda bothered me so yah. and thanks for crit. you guys. Im going to edit the first chapter later so if you notice changes, then dont panic!**

**It's just me correcting errors!**

**I also lold at a review I had, LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!! YOU MOFOS!**

**But if you guys have a problem with me bashing JigglyPuff and Herman then let me know and I'll stop.**

**Any suggestions for the next character? I have a couple in mind...**

**Also Bowser's story was way too getting long, so I just cut it short for now, I'll continue later when I do the others.**

_'Bowser, well, he doesnt really consider himself to have friends, just acquintances, every single morning he would pick on poor 'FairyFag'. Poor guy. He also picks on everyone else as someone mentioned. Hes also been going on the internet lately, so every now and then Bowser would use that retarded ass internet slang, the guy seriously needs a freakin' life..and a girlfriend...considering his access to the internet has been increasing each day.'_

When Bowser came home from visiting his usual minions and offspring. He instantly went for the laptop that he left on the couch. He had been wanting to go on the internet all day. He turned on the laptop and waited for it to start. Sitting there, he pondered what kind of comments he had been left with from EncyclopediaDramatica and other various websites.

Thats when he noticed something.

"Snake, have you been using my laptop again?" Bowser shouted irritably when he noticed that his files of screenshots were moved again.

"No." A muffled voice sounded near him.

Bowser looked to his right to see a large box sitting by him.

"What the? What are you doing in there?"

"None of your business."

"Are you beating it off?"

"No!"

"Yah right, you Fapster."

"Fapster?"

"Shutup."

Finally, Bowser was able to access his Internet. It always seem to take a large amount of time when loading pages. Bowser let out a groan. When the page loaded, he clicked a few times and waited impatiently for the new page to load again.

"Do you know whos been on my int-ar-nets? "

Snake stiffled a snicker.

"I saw Pit and Mini-man go on. " Snake said.

Bowser looked down at the box and cocked a brow.

"Are you sure? You're not lying to me so you could get Pit into trouble are you? Cuz I could just whoop his ass anytime. " Bowser questioned suspiciously.

"Uhh...No. I think I may have seen Marth go on for a second too. "

"Pit will get what he deserves later, NOBODY touches my crap and gets away with it. "

"What about Marth and Mini-Man?"

"Forget them."

Bowser looked back at his laptop screen to see if it was done loading, to his surprise, he found a message.

**(Someone Has left You a Flame, click HERE to go to your fgt userpage)**

Bowser smirked.

_Ha, no doubt its a message about my brilliant writing about Mario._

Bowser then clicked on the link. Bowser gasped to find a rather hateful flame towards him.

**You are a faggot, I blanked your relly fuking stubid artikl, becase it was full of uter closterfuk fail, you are a pese of shit, DIE, and get out of ED, nobody wants you here. AwesomeDude**

_Who in the fucking hell is AwesomeDude?_

Bowser gritted his teeth, clenching his fists.

_Why, if I ever find out who it is, they're in for some slaughtering!_

_He can't even spell correctly, the faggot! I bet he's a 12 year old basementdweller!_

Bowser began to type furiously.

An explosion was heard suddenly, the smell of burnt clothing and flesh was in the air. Bowser stopped to examine the box. The sound came from inside the box, since there's black smoke coming out of the box.

A burnt Snake crawled out of the box and slowly crawled his way out of the room without a word.

Bowser returned to typing furiously, almost smashing his poor laptop with his sharp nails.

"Hey...What are you doing?" Samus had walked in quietly and was peering over Bowser's shoulder, almost leaning on it.

"Nothing!" Bowser growled covering his screen.

"What are you guys talking about?"

Snake walked in with fresh looking clothes and sat by Bowser.

"Bowser's lookin' at porn. You might wanna leave him alone." Samus said as she walked into the kitchen.

"Aw really? Let me see." Snake said stupidly, attempting to look at the hand covered screen.

"It's not porn!" Bowser shouted and moved his hand. "That Samus, always pissin' people off with her faggotry."

"Faggotry?" Snake repeated, sounding a little annoyed.

"I heard that."

Bowser snickered.

Samus is so much fun to fool around with.

"Samus, did you go to that new gun-shop that was built on Arm Street?" Snake questioned standing up and stretching.

"Uh, yah." Samus answered from the kitchen.

Snake entered the kitchen, leaving from Bowser's sight.

"Hey, I was gonna go there yesterday, but it was visiting day for me, so I couldn't...So how was it?"

"It was okay, didnt have much that I already have."

"Aww, that's a shame. Did you get that bomb laser you were talking about?"

Bowser turned his attention to his laptop, the conversation grew faint when Bowser thought long and hard about his response to the negative comment. His response is perfect enough, so he sent it to the retard who dared question Bowser's authority.

A quick movement caught his eye, Bowser shot his arm out to grab the little fucker that was messing with his laptop.

"Hey you little RUNT, didn't Link teach you NOT to use people's stuff?"

"Ay! Let go Bowser!" Mini-Me retorted, punching and kicking at thin air.

Bowser laughed and spun Mini-Me around with a single nail in amusement.

"What were you doing on my laptop you turd?"

"I was playing games!"

"What were you doing moving my stuff on my computer!?"

"I didn't!" Mini-Me pleaded.

"Next time I see you on my laptop or hear about it, you're deadmeat squirt."

"O-Okay."

With a kick from Bowser's foot, he sent Mini-Me flying out the window.

Bowser looked back to his laptop, he hoped AwesomeDude will comment soon. With a sigh, he closed his laptop.

"Hey Bowser, we're gonna go trip grannies in the retirement home. We're gonna do it on the stairs too, so we could watch them tumble down the stairs."

Bowser looked to his left and found himself staring at a fat short man with a cricked mustache and his fat penguin friend.

"Tripping grannies down the stairs? You guys are pathetic."

"So are you in or out?"

Bowser looked back to Snake, wondering if Snake was doing something more appealing.

A smirking Snake sat at the kitchen table talking with Samus.

Bowser frowned at the idea.

_I don't think so._

"Okay Im in."

"I thought you said we were pathetic?" DeDeDe said narrowing his eyes.

"Yeah, well, Im a hypocrite. Sue me."

"All right!" Wario smirked.

All three moved out.

--+

Bowser trudged in, slamming the door on DeDeDe's face.

"Must check internet." Bowser murmered as he tottered his way to his room.

"Hey Bowser, what are you gonna do to Pit tonight?"

"Later!" Bowser shouted, his pace hastened.

He heard a faint response of 'sheesh' as he walked.

In order for Bowser to reach his room, he would have to take an elevator because his room was on the last floor, and it's the last door in the hallway.

Bowser pushed the button, which lit up once pressed.

He had the last floor and room because MasterHand _hated _his guts. The reason why was that MasterHand saw right _through _him. Behind Bowser's mischievous' bad behavior, laid a pathetic, sad, wimpy, crying, lonely monster who's reason's for acting so badly is to solely get attention.

Bowser never told anyone about it, it didn't matter to him.

If he ever decided to spill it out, it would only ruin him and make him more miserable.

He didn't care that he was this way, nor does he care that MasterHand _knows_ him.

Who in the hell would want a crying wimpy turtle anyways?

It's stupid to cry and whine about it. Bowser's easier way of handling his inner problems is to pick on other losers to boost his self esteem, and kidnap princesses.

_Ahh...Peach...good times..._

The only effect that MasterHand has on his knowledge of Bowser is that there's this uncomfortable, weird relationship between them.

Like last Thursday for instance;

_Bowser walked into the elevator, pushed the arrow key, leaned against the ridge, and crossed his arms._

_"Hey."_

_Without giving a glance, Bowser replied,"Hey."_

_MasterHand coughed._

_Bowser tapped the floor with his foot in annoyance._

_Music needs to be changed to heavy metal or something..._

_Why isn't he talking?_

_Uncomfortable moment here, better say something._

_Lets play a game, it'll be more fun that way._

_Let the games begin..._

_"Ike told me that he saw you touching my shit again. Frankly, Im tired of you touching my stuff with your dirty ass fingers and throwing it out. Can you not do that? I always have to pick it up from the yard or I have to go to Samus' or Snake's or whoever the fuck's room to get it. It's annoying. Stop it, or I'm going to beat the hell out of you."_

_That felt good._

_Now it's MasterHand's turn, and it being MasterHand, it will always turn ugly with his juvenile and nasty temper ways._

_He's going to play the nice, calm faggot card._

_"Well Bowser, if you hadn't let your shit be laying around all the fucking time, I wouldn't be throwing it out now would I? I like my castle clean bitch, and if you leave your shit around, it'll throw it out, I'm not your screaming birth mother, clean up after yourself you fucking douche." He says calmly as predicted._

_Bowser felt his temper rise, but had to keep his cool._

_This is a game, a game of who can stay calm the longest._

_Bowser narrowed his eyes._

_"If you hadn't put me in that shitty last room, I wouldn't always be leaving my crap all over the place."_

_MasterHand didn't even move._

_"If you weren't such a pathetic fucking douche, you wouldn't have that problem."_

_Bowser shifted his leg._

"_So you hate me more than those fags; Pit, Yoshi, Pikachu, Herman, and JigglyPuff enough for you to put me in that crappy room? You have lame tastes for detesting certain people you moron."_

_MasterHand twitched._

_Ha._

_Struck a nerve finally._

_"FUCK YOU FAT FUCKING TORTOISE BASTARD." He yelled._

_Its rare that he gets to MasterHand like that. It was usually the other way around. __It was quiet the rest of the elevator ride. _

_Awkward silence. _

_MasterHand mad as hell. __Bowser smirking triumphantly. __When it was MasterHand's stop, he floated out quite quickly and passed by Pikachu who greeted him with a hello._

_"Shutup you fucking yellow rat." He growled in the distance._

_Pikachu had a weird look._

_He entered the elevator a moment later._

_"Whats gotten into him?" Pikachu mumbled, pressing the button._

_Bowser smirked._

The elevator finally opened.

Bowser stepped in. He smiled once he saw who was in it.

"Uh..Uhh..Uh..Hi Bowser."

An evil grin stretched from his lips.

"Hello Pit." Bowser replied punching the button.

The doors closed.

"So uhh...What did you do today?"

"The usual," He smirked, then he remembered something and continued,"Hey Pit, have you been on my laptop?"

"Uhh...Yeah..."

"Did you move the files on my desktop? And what were you doing on it? Since when do angels go on computers? Really."

"I was looking up information."

Bowser growled. _Pit is soo gonna get it for even touching his beautiful laptop._

"Dont go on my laptop again Pit."

"U-Um, okay." Pit stuttered.

"Look, I don't want any problems Bowser, how about we squash this?"

_Look at him, the fag. He's shaking already, and I haven't even threatened him yet..._

_What should I do to him today?_

_Hmm..._

Suddenly Bowser punched him in the face. Making Pit stumble back, grasping his cheek.

"What was that for!? "

"What? "

Pit didn't say anything, but merely stared at him.

Upon realizing what was about to happen, Pit quickly started to push the button repeatedly, sweating.

Bowser cracked his knuckles, he wasn't really in the mood for torturing Pit creatively like always, so he will give Pit an old fashioned beating.

"Oh Palutena..."

Bowser trudged out, leaving behind a dismembered Pit groaning in pain.

When he got to the end of the hallway, he inserted his keys in and turned. Bowser slammed the door open and slammed it shut when he entered. He sat on his bed and turned on his laptop.

A growl escaped his lips.

He _sooo _hated waiting. When the computer loaded the desktop and files, Bowser clicked on Internet Explorer.

It was dark already, and the light from his laptop illuminated his face a bit with blue shadows.

"Time to go on the int-ar-nets.."

Bowser decided to visit one of his favourite websites, and **Lulz4Us**.**com**

He smiled.

"Bastards would love these pictures."

He clicked a few times before he started laughing uncontrollably. A loud knocked suddenly erupted from his door.

_Why are people bothering me so much today? Leave me at peace people!_

"WHAT!?" Bowser growled.

"It's Samus."

"God, what do you want? Can't you hear me typing?" He snapped.

Samus took a while before responding,"Forget it.." a shuffling of feet was heard before the castle grew silent again.

_Probably got angry or something. __Pfft...get the heck out of here stupid Samus. P__fft...women...who needs em'? __She's not really a woman though...she's more like...a man...l__ike...a sheman...hahahaha...better pick on her about that tomorrow._

Bowser returned to looking at his laptop screen. Bowser smirked at the comments he had received;

**I LOLED**

**You sir, are made of win!**

**LOL**

**Much lulz was had here!**

**WE DINE ON SPARTA LULZ TONIGHT**

**Wat teh fuk? You go here 2? You riuning everthing for me you fuking fag.**

**That was some good lulz there.**

**pffft.**

_Wait a minute...WHAT?_

Bowser squinted his eyes.

**Wat teh fuk? You go here 2? You riuning everthing for me you fuking fag.**

Bowser squinted harder.

**Wat teh fuk? You go here 2? You riuning everthing for me you fuking fag.**

He squinted even harder.

**Wat teh fuk? You go here 2? You riuning everthing for me you fuking fag.**

He glared.

**you fuking fag.**

His eyes burned with hate.

**fuking fag.**

Hate washed all over his body.

**fag.**

Bowser looked at the screen again.

**fag**

Bowser roared, throwing things off his bed. After getting done throwing his small fit, bowser began typing furiously;

**Who are you?**

Bowser waited a few minutes before he received a response.

**Its me AwesomeDude u fuking fag, GTFU Lulz4Us you retard.**

Bowser types angrilly;

**You need to learn how to spell you fucking retard.**

A response with an explicit image appeared afterwards;

**That maybe so, but I fuked you in the ass and now ur butthurt.**

Bowser looked at the other responses;

**Wow he's a butthurt fag. **

**Can't believe I thought that fgt was cool.**

**Yup a Butthurt response is a butthurt response.**

**LOL he got burnt**

Bowser types furiously;

**WTF /b/ he can't even spell!**

With that response left, he exits the website.

"This guy got bastards to turn on me. Who is this guy?"

Bowser clicks his way to Encyclopediadramatica, to see what comments he was left with.

When a window pops up suddenly;

**AwesomeDude: Were u going? **

**AwesomeDude:You chiken...nobody likes u...**

Bowser exits the window and blocked him.

He clicks a little more before reaching to his page, a comment was left there by AwesomeDude as predicted. Bowser roared and flipped his bed over. Bowser thrashes everything about, growling and snarling. Completely full of uncontrollable rage, he throws out his beautiful laptop without a second thought. Stomping on his floor and howling out wildly.

_WHO IS AWESOMEDUDE!?_

* * *


	3. Olimar's Best Friend

**

* * *

**

NOTE: Sorry I haven't updated in a LOOONG time, I had loads of homework and stuff. Also I write and sit back and think about it for days, and put more into it later or correct it. Yah I take my time on my writing this story. Im also experimenting with using new words, so if you see something wrong tell me.

**And to the person who reviewed not liking the cursing, this chapter doesnt have much cursing. So it seems okay to ME, but if you think it's gay then tell me, and I'll edit it. **

**Okay regarding Olimar, Olimar is a complex character and he was a challenge to do, and I had fun. He's also my fav. :3 I dont know why but I always thought Pit would easilly get along with Olimar because they're quite alike in a complex way. Also I decided to do at least 2 chapters on each character, because it takes sooo long to even get to the point of the story. so yah, next chapter will also be about Olimar.**

* * *

_Captain Olimar, very intelligent I'll tell you that. He seems to know allot and is highly bold, and is kinda playful. Pit is strangely Olimar's best friend, despite Pit being a idiot. They go almost everywhere together like fags. It's weird. I read Olimar's journal one time, he was taking notes on...us...Calling us strange beings and crap. And even did sketches of me and the other smashers, it was interesting I'll tell you that. Though if Bowser ever read that, Bowser would turn into a raging lunatic and go on a rage looking for Olimar. There are times where Olimar seems to feel all...high and mighty of himself, just a little tiny bit, in my opinion. Because of this, DeDeDe doesn't like him very much and often calls him a "pompous chump." Sometimes Bowser corrects DeDeDe by refering him to "Pompous Asshole."_

_Olimar has also proudly told us several times that he has a wife and kids. Sadly, Peach was around one of those times and she 'awwwed' and hugged him all day along with some other females. All the girls were around him the whole time that day, except for Samus._

_We haven't seen his family yet, but from what I know about the Smashers, it will be a disaster that day._

_Also the douche keeps bitching to me, always asking me when I'll bring his family over to visit. I always have to tell him ' Whenever I have time.'_

* * *

Pit grabbed some of the grass with his foot subconsciously out of boredom.

"Tomorrow, I'll be visiting my wife and children. There's no doubt it will be a wonderful evening." Olimar mentions. A red Pikmin sat beside him.

"Oh yeah? That's great."

"Not just great. It's wonderful. " Olimar added as he adjusted his pants.

"Ah." Pit smiled.

"I was thinking of taking a couple of friends with me so my family will know who I communicate with. " Olimar stated, looking Pit squarely in the eyes. Pit took the hint.

"Alright I'll go," Pit says, then looked up at Olimar. The light reflected off Olimar's helmet, blinding Pit a little by just trying to look at him. Pit shaded his eyes with his hand from the flare."who else is coming?"

"Link, Samus, Mario...Yoshi ...and I think Sonic." Olimar answered thoughtfully.

"Haha. Alright," Pit said cheerfully,"So I get to meet your family...how come you're not bringing any Smash kids?"

Pit wanted to see what Olimar would say.

"Well, I thought about that. But then I thought, they wouldn't know the difference. They would think you're a kid."

Pit felt stunned. _How did he know __**that**__? _

"What makes you think I'm older?" he found himself asking. Olimar cleared his throat before he spoke.

"Well, before I came here. I wanted to know what I was getting myself into, so I requested that I get information on everything. If I had gone ignorant, I would have been pummeled for sure. So MasterHand gave me the files and I studied them."

"Oh..." Pit tilted his head," tell me how MasterHand came to you.."

"Well," Olimar began,"it all started when MasterHand was pounding furiously on my door..."

--+--+--

_"Olimar dear! Can you answer that? I'm doing laundry!"_

_"I'm busy sweetie!"_

_"I'M BUSY WITH THE LAUNDRY OLIMAR! DON'T MAKE ME ANGRY!"_

_Olimar stifled a groan and lifted himself off his comfy chair. He trudged his way to the door, that was erupting in loud bashing noises. Olimar unlocked the door and cracked the door open enough for Olimar to see who he was looking at._

_It was a giant floating white hand...and it startled Olimar for a moment._

_"Yes? Can I help you?"_

_"You Captain Olimar right?" the hand asked gruffly. Olimar scanned the hand up and down thoughtfully, almost rudely._

_"Why yes. Who are you?" _

_"My name is MasterHand, I came here on behalf of the SuperSmashBrother Corporation. Actually, I'm the Vice President of the SuperSmashBrothers to be more correct." MasterHand says sternly. Olimar's eyes narrowed, he didn't want no insurance. He sure as heck was now feeling agitated._

_"I'm sorry, I already have insurance-"Olimar began to close the door when the hand's finger blocked the doorway._

_"Hey, don't you fucking shut that door in my face. I'm trying to offer you something better than that shit job you currently have. You could be famous Olimar, your name could be known through out all the galaxies. Through out all the other dimensions out there, and any other world out there that's breathing air. I offer you an unbelievable great pay, a good place for you and your family to stay, fame, and some great adventure. Take it or leave it asshole." MasterHand growls._

_Olimar gave MasterHand a blank stare, taking in the information. _

_"I'm sorry, I've been getting allot of insurance salesmen at my door lately. Please come in." Olimar apologized sympathetically. MasterHand floated in quietly. Olimar directed him to a brown couch, where he sat comfortably._

_"Whoa!" a little boy trotted out in awe,"no way, it's MasterHand! Cool! What's he doing here papa?"_

_"Son I-"_

_"I was asking your old man if he wanted to be apart of the super smash brothers." MasterHand interrupted rudely. Olimar glared at MasterHand, fully aware of what he's doing._

_"Cool! Papa, you should go! If you do, I'd be the coolest kid in the school!" the boy shouted overjoyed, and continued his little parade," Captain Olimar. Commander of Pikmin. Slayed many monsters and risked his life, now in Brawl. Kicking people's butt!" The boy ran into his father's arms._

_Olimar was shocked, he had no idea why his son was acting this way. Why he was so happy... but he felt happy that his boy was proud of him. He had a thoughtful look, gazing down at his son, Olimar Jr. He was actually considering it..._

_"So.. tell me more...about this smash brothers.."_

_"You've never really heard of us?"_

_Olimar shook his head._

_"Boy, do you need allot to learn..."_

_"Im a fast learner."_

--+--+

"Touching..." Pit chuckled,"that's it?"

"No." Olimar replied, petting a fat purple pikmin. The purple Pikmin cooed in pleasure."After he explained everything, he asked me if I wanted to join."

"Uh-huh."

--+--+

_"So what will it be?"_

_"Huh?"_

_"Are you going to join?"_

_Olimar looked down at his son, who's gazing up at him with pleading eyes. He sighed. He hated disappointing his son._

_"Sure, but in one condition."_

_"Alright..."_

_"I want to have documents of each player's life history, fighting styles and fighting techniques. The dangers of what I will face too. Anything that I need to know."_

_"Hmmm...that's quite a condition...but I see no harm in it. Condition granted." MasterHand nodded himself._

_"Great. I'll hope to get those documents soon!"_

_"You'll get it now,"MasterHand snapped his fingers and a pile of papers magically appeared in his palm,"here."_

_He handed the papers to Olimar._

_"Yes!"_

--+--+

"Oh." Pit only says.

"Well, since I'm going with you. You have to come with me on my next HomeDay then." Pit playfully glares.

"Deal." Olimar shook Pit's hand and did a special buddy handshake.

"Hey faggots!"Pit and Olimar whirled around to see a floating MasterHand," We're gonna go today okay? Tomorrow isn't a good day for me since I have to go to an emergency meeting which will probably last about 3 to 5 fucking hours. I bought you guys some McDonald's just in case you were hungry. Olimar get your things and the people you want to take over there so we could go already. I'll be waiting in my room. Don't take too fucking long or else you guys will piss me off."

With that MasterHand slid the glass door open and disappeared into the castle.

Olimar turned to Pit. " Do you know where the other smashers are?"

"I know where Link and Yoshi are. I'll go get them, I'll meet you at MasterHand's room."

Pit waved to Olimar and sprinted off. Olimar sighed as he walked into the castle, his Pikmin following as always humming to themselves.

"Oh, here comes Olimar." Roy commented from the living room. Olimar entered the living room to find Roy resting his feet on a small table. Sonic laid lazily on the couch across from Roy. Sonic eyed Olimar lazily, cheek on palm.

"What were you doing, Olimar? Feeding your pikmin again?" Roy asked, looking up at Olimar.

"No, talking with Pit." Olimar replied.

Roy said nothing but returned his gaze to the T.V. set.

"Sonic have you decided on that trip we talked about?"

"Un...yeah." Sonic said.

"So are you going?"

"Yeah, got nothing else better to do."

"Do you mind going today?"

Sonic cocked a brow.

"He changed your schedule didn't he?" Sonic questioned with annoyance in his voice.

"He did. Not much of a big deal to me." Olimar answered casually.

"Okay, I'll go," Sonic leapt off the couch and began cleaning a ear out with a pinkie, Olimar wanted to throw up,"who else is coming?"

"You'll see."

Sonic sighed as he followed Olimar and waved his goodbye to Roy.

"Seeya Red.."

"Do you happen to know where Samus and Mario could possibly be?" Olimar inquired as he climbed up the stairs.

"I think Mario's in his room," Sonic answered thoughtfully,"let me check..."

Sonic disappeared suddenly.

Olimar looked around, his Pikmin copying their master's movements.

"Sonic?..Whe-..."He trailed off upon realizing where Sonic had gone.

Minutes passed and Olimar glances at his watch.

Sonic appeared in the middle of the five Pikmin.

"EEEEEEE! EE! EE! EE!" The Pikmin squeeled scurrying away in fright.

"Hehehe Whoops! Sorry!" Sonic laughed nervously at their cute reactions. Olimar shook his head. _How many times has this happened? Many times that's for sure. heh. _But it always left him warm-hearted for his fellow Pikmin. Olimar blew his whistle for his Pikmin to come back. They all came back squealing as usual, but a red Pikmin tripped and fell.

Sonic and Olimar only observed this before Olimar decided to help him up.

Olimar trudged over to him, gestured his hand to the fallen Pikmin.

The Pikmin looked up at him. A blank curious face as always.

And he _**slapped**_ his hand away with his little hand and slowly arose to his feet.

"Oh...my..."Olimar looked to a bewildered hedgehog and looked back to the Pikmin.

"Are they supposed to do that?" Sonic asked curiously.

"No, no they're not. This is the third time that this has happened, to this pikmin in particular." Olimar pondered. He couldn't believe this was happening, for he deathly feared for a mutiny. It was one of his nightmares in fact! That was the first thing that came into his mind. Maybe they were working too hard and are starting to feel agitated by Olimar. Yes, maybe that's it. More free time for his Pikmin will do. Or perhaps it was deeper than that? Nonetheless, Olimar had to do something. The spaceman knelt down and relaxed his hand on the Pikmin's shoulder tenderly. " I don't know what's going on in there, but I will try and help you. In the meantime I'll give you a simple name"

The red Pikmin only stared.

"Rebel."

The Pikmin's eyes glimmered at the name. Olimar chuckles when he noticed this.

"We better get going." Olimar said more to himself than Sonic and slowly stood up.

"Mario's coming, I told him we'd be here." Sonic said.

"There you guys are!" Mario sighed as he appeared by Sonic's side. "Why are we going today? I thought it was tomorrow?"

"MasterHand changed the schedule again." Sonic answered.

"He does that too me all the time. Mama mia!"

"Wait for me at MasterHand's room, I'll go get Samus." Olimar instructed.

Sonic and Mario nodded silently at Olimar as they part their ways.

--

A spaceman entered the gym daringly, for he was surrounded by a bunch of villains.

"What are you doing here Olimar?" Gannondorf questioned. He was eyeing Olimar suspiciously. Gannondorf wore a tank-top, and in one of his Gerudo cultured pants. At Gannondorf's words Bowser dropped the heavy weight on the concrete and sat up panting.

"Do you happen to know where Samus might be?" Olimar asks quite politely.

"Who wants to know?" Bowser almost growled.

"I do, she told me she'd go to HomeDay with me."

Bowser looked to Gannon who shrugged.

"She's in her room from what I know," Bowser says and lets out a frustrated growl,"she was tired, and she was pissing me off. She seemed to be stressed or something, I don't know. Women are complicated."

Olimar walked out and trudged past five doors before he faced Samus' door.

Olimar coughed.

He softly knocks on the door awaiting for a response.

"Yeah...who is it?..."

"It's Olimar, may I come in?"

"Sure, whatever."

Olimar walked in and softly closed the door.

"What the hell do you want, Olimar?" Samus asks coldly. Olimar scanned the room for Samus. His eyes widened and he quickly looked away blushing madly. She was laying in her bed with pants and ...a bra.

"Uh...uh...uh-do you mind putting a shirt on?"

"Bothers you that much? Snake doesn't mind it..."

Olimar jerked his head back in surprise. A ruffling of clothes was heard.

"Heheh, kidding...okay what did you want to talk to me about? And you could look now, I have a shirt on."

Olimar sighed and turned to Samus. _Im so relieved that Samus put her shirt back on! I've never encountered a female like her! Very complex and hard to figure out, I hope my intellect is enough to interpret her._

"My HomeDay is today, do you want to come anyways?"

"Aw, today?" Samus moans in a irritated manner,"Why today of all days? God!"

Olimar petted Rebel who cooed in return.

"Alriiight...I'll go..."

"Okay, lets go."

Olimar was now starting to wonder if it was actually a good idea to take Samus now...


End file.
